Lovefool

randomly

2010-03-08T19:42:53Z

- my back is aching from either (sleeping at awkward positions last night, because i woke up with my feet on the pillow) OR (too much handbanging at PARAMORE) i choose to believe the latter. =)

- i'd rather my mailbox get flooded with spam than with a HUGE pending workload. =(

- Alice In Wonderland is 3 out of 5 stars. Hollywood is fast running out of creative juice. sad. visuals was good, but the rest was just bleah. 1 star for visuals, 1 star for Johnny Depp + Helena Bonham Carter + 1 star for Director Burton because i like him. Anne Hathaway had her arms in the air for the entire movie, can somebody tell me why?! and Alice....her timing was....pretty......bad?! dont blame her because she is young and has a last name that no one can pronounce.

- needs to buy a certain Coach bag. =))))))

- I LOVE HELLO KITTY.

- just spent over $10 on those UFO catching machines trying to catch a Hello Kitty in vain. i'll be better off just buying it from the shop. SIAN.

- i want to eat crab.

- bought a moleskine and havent wrote anything in it.

- school + work + business endeavours = very busy.

- dreaming of white sandy beaches and clear waters.

- DESPERATE TO DO SOMETHING CREATIVE. argh. "use it or lose it" - so true.

- dad returning home in 4 days. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. i've enjoyed you very much, my 2 months of peace and quiet.

- i need another life.

just thinking

2010-01-28T16:52:30Z

unspeakable truths
concealing lies,

all for fighting this darn war.

can't you see?
we're wild animals, and nothing can change that.
then may our bones return to dust and our souls blown away

into the darkness.

chanmengye @ 2010-01-25T00:59:00

2010-01-24T16:59:31Z

stuck in the middle,

but can I get out of it? hmm..

ANYWAY. Did i let anyone know that i HATE Miley Cyrus?! She is freaking annoying. like seriosly annoying. I dont get why all those teenage girls love her so much. argh. the sound of her voice irks me like crazy, it sounds so freaking awful! watch her spoil the song below. And why did they put her beside Beyonce (whom i LOVE)??!!

whatever miley. gross.

2010

2010-01-19T16:24:45Z

This is 3 weeks late, but I've managed to come up with what I want to achieve over the next year, that is my resolution for this year. haha. I've made no mention to a resolution last year and indeed, i haven't achieved a damn thing in 2009. So i guess resolutions do work for the part that they give you a start on having purposes.

The theme for this year is HEALTH. Physically, mentally and socially.

Physically - I'll make sure that I eat well. That means less junk food, more fruits and veggies, more breakfasts and regular timely meals. no more having lunch at 4pm and dinner at 11pm. Working out is definitely part of it and I'm already taking weekly pilates classes. I'll also visit the dentist twice this year. AND keep to my skincare routine.

Mentally - There is a plan to increase my culture and intellectual intake. I've already finished 3 or 4 books in the last 2 months and are devouring some more. All i need is to watch more films and study more art. I should also probably take an interest into current affairs and start reading the papers daily. (i read only on my ST app and TIME app heh). I must also study harder! I aim for nothing below a C for modules this sem! I won't be satisfied even with a C!

Socially - yes. i will start going out and making more friends. sigh.

somehow, the social part is the only part of my resolution that i'm not confident in achieving. I'm already halfway there for the rest of it, like I'm exercising, intentionally ordering more fruit and veg, reading as much as possible, visiting more art blogs ect..but socially I'm afraid that my scorecard is still zilch. same 10 friends day in day out. (yah i can actually count my friends with 2 hands)

2010 will be the year i find myself and be happy. I WILL BE HAPPY.

it's a rich man's world

2010-01-13T16:26:47Z

Haven't blogged for ages, but this has been on my mine for quite some time now.

If you know me, you'll know that I want to lead the sort of life that allows me to indulge in my pleasures amongst other things.

So....this thought refuses to leave my mind.

The thought...of $20 million dollars. How does one ordinary folk with no extraordinary talent make such a fortune in a lifetime? I would very much love to give an answer to that question.

I WANT TO MAKE $20 MILLION DOLLARS!

Now, for the hardest part of $20 million. How?

hmmmm..*twindles thumbs*

everybody wants to be a princess.

2009-12-30T20:42:06Z

all i want for christmas is.....

2009-12-02T19:36:16Z

such a cute commercial. =)

anybody wants to buy me a Kindle? =D

it's a rich man's world

2009-11-17T16:35:03Z

Just got lectured for my exploding credit card bill again. =( Didn't realise i spent so much last month, in fact i thought i spent lesser. I'll be better off without a credit card really. I wont get one when i start working. I PROMISE! if not i'll be in perpetual debt and will declare bankrupt by the age of 30. hahah.

From now on, I will leave my card at home for 3 months and do all of my transactions in cash. boo hoo.

But anyway...WISHLIST FOR CHRISTMAS!

1. iSqueeze (really need it for my aching legs!)

2. New Ray Ban shades! (will get this when my first paycheck from borders comes in!) anybody wants to get my old pair? I've only worn it out a couple of times and it's in excellent condition. Getting a new pair cos this pair is too big and keeps slipping off my nose! leave a comment for more details =)

3. Kate Moss style blazer. Goodness knows how long i've been searching for the perfect blazer. Not the boyfriend kind, not the shoulder-pads kind nor the ones with puffy sleeves and lots of details. Just a good quality basic hip length black/navy, 2 button, with buttons on sleeves, fitting and flattering blazer. reasonably priced. Somehow, i have the hardest time looking for the simplest things. Everytime i want to look for a simple piece of clothing i cant find the perfect one. because they either have too much frills or the material is too lousy. IF i do find the perfect one, it's too expensive. whyyyyy......

actually...that's it! the rest can really wait. just cant wait to get my new shades and somebody can sponsor me an isqueeze. thankewvehniceeeee.

amazing!

2009-11-11T16:13:39Z

what is more amazing than seeing your fav model dress up as your fav singer?

credits to Harper's Bazaar.

this totally made my night.

life on track

2009-11-09T19:50:27Z

Did I mention that I just started work at Borders? :D

It has always been my dream (amongst many) to work in a bookstore, because I like to read books, i like the sight of books and stationary, i like people who read books and i like hanging out at bookstores just because.

The funny thing about working at a bookstore is that you feel obliged to have read most of the titles, if not the more popular ones and know at least something about each genre of books. I have to admit that I haven't been reading much lately. heck, i couldn't even finish reading my Alice In Wonderland in one sitting. But! my new job has given me new motivation to re-ignite this hobby! =)

Besides the need to read more, I really need motivation and discipline for school. Good grades are non-negotiables because my grades in poly SUCK and I really wanna push myself to achieve the best that I can. I'm in my 20s now, and there's a need to be grown-up. I've never felt this way my entire life till now, I have a sense that I need to achieve something and establish myself as a successful individual in society. (and that means going into a field of work that I enjoy and being successful at it.) No idea why I'm feeling this way. To be honest, there's been an undercurrent feeling that I've been under-achieving for the past few years, maybe it's time to prove myself to me.

motivate. discipline. action.

get it together mengsss.

P/s: Please start on that (@*#&(@#& essay research. THANK YOU. (see, i really need discipline.) :(

chanmengye @ 2009-10-23T13:13:00

2009-10-23T05:15:37Z

"What Teachers Make, or
Objection Overruled, or
If things don't work out, you can always go to law school"
Taylor Mali

He says the problem with teachers is, "What's a kid going to learn
from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?"
He reminds the other dinner guests that it's true what they say about
teachers:
Those who can, do; those who can't, teach.

I decide to bite my tongue instead of his
and resist the temptation to remind the other dinner guests
that it's also true what they say about lawyers.

Because we're eating, after all, and this is polite company.

"I mean, you're a teacher, Taylor," he says.
"Be honest. What do you make?"

And I wish he hadn't done that
(asked me to be honest)
because, you see, I have a policy
about honesty and ass-kicking:
if you ask for it, I have to let you have it.

You want to know what I make?

I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could.
I can make a C+ feel like a Congressional medal of honor
and an A- feel like a slap in the face.
How dare you waste my time with anything less than your very best.

I make kids sit through 40 minutes of study hall
in absolute silence. No, you may not work in groups.
No, you may not ask a question.
Why won't I let you get a drink of water?
Because you're not thirsty, you're bored, that's why.

I make parents tremble in fear when I call home:
I hope I haven't called at a bad time,
I just wanted to talk to you about something Billy said today.
Billy said, "Leave the kid alone. I still cry sometimes, don't you?"
And it was the noblest act of courage I have ever seen.

I make parents see their children for who they are
and what they can be.

You want to know what I make?

I make kids wonder,
I make them question.
I make them criticize.
I make them apologize and mean it.
I make them write, write, write.
And then I make them read.
I make them spell definitely beautiful, definitely beautiful, definitely
beautiful
over and over and over again until they will never misspell
either one of those words again.
I make them show all their work in math.
And hide it on their final drafts in English.
I make them understand that if you got this (brains)
then you follow this (heart) and if someone ever tries to judge you
by what you make, you give them this (the finger).

Let me break it down for you, so you know what I say is true:
I make a goddamn difference! What about you?

smile

2009-09-28T19:20:51Z

I should resume my "smile at somebody today" campaign.

Explaining that, I actually went on an effort to smile at random strangers i meet on the streets everyday sometime last year. For no apparent reason, other than taking on the personal responsibility to spread love to the world.

Than, I stopped and totally forgot about it after a couple of weeks trying.

Results I got from last year was that Ang Mohs are generally more friendly and would even say "hi" when you smile at them. Singaporeans would let out a faint smile too, but most are probably too shocked to respond in time. But hey, some Singaporean has got to start somewhere, sometime right? Let it be mengz than.

I'm probably well known for not smiling. But that's only because that's my "normal" face and i don't plan on doing anything about it. I don't smile at people in school or in church because of a simple reason that I simply do not want to. Because people in an institution you attend regularly will most probably want to befriend you. And.....i really don't want to make friends. Strangers on the street are different! The handsome angmoh at city hall will NOT want to befriend me, and all he will remember is that some asian girl smiled at him thinking that he is hot - and that, will make his day.

and my smiling campaign is all about making people's day.

Smile at at least one person a day!

I need for myself.....

2009-09-27T17:59:42Z

1. John Lennon's sunglasses. I can't find good ones anywhere. =(

2. Doc Martens. Still deciding between a matte black or patent red (or raaaaaad as some might like to say).

3. Yellow flats. Why is it so hard to find decent flats in Singapore? Everything one can commonly get has tacky designs, is not comfortable or looks cheap. All I'm asking for is something like that and it's taking me ages to find.

4. A funky backpack. Haven't seen one that caught my eye.

5. A cool flannel shirt. I actually have 3 or 4 in my closet that i don't wear because they are a) too small b) too ugly c) not cool enough
d) look too Nashville-ish. Help me find my perfect flannel!

6. FISHEYE!!!!

7. Pilates class - either my tummy is outta control or ~~I'm preggers (choy!)~~

Of course, there's are always a million and one things I need at a single point of time, but just thought i'll share this with you.

COS I'M BORED OUT OF MY WITS! =(

Read!

2009-09-16T17:29:41Z

Today in school for Media Audiences and the Public, we had a lady from National Library Board (NLB) come talk to us about this reading campaign. The campaign has apparently been running for its 5th consecutive year, but i bet most of you have never heard about it.

The aims of the campaign is to have Singaporeans rediscover the joy of reading and through habitual reading, have us armed with important skills like creativity and critical thinking.

Well, now to give my two cents worth. I dont think Singaporeans have discovered the joy of reading, as to RE-discover it. Most of what we read are only textbooks, newspapers or magazines. Our reading habits involve very little fiction, which, in my opinion is where the joy of reading is in.

The lady spoke about her difficulties advocating habitual reading because people are so deterred to reading. They think that reading is only what you do when you are in school, and you dont have to do it anymore when you get out of school. Which is sad, isn't the government promoting lifelong learning?

During the Q&A, one of my classmates spoke up saying that in NS, the NS men are given porn mags to read instead of the army promoting a healthy reading habit (say, of fiction, self-help books or stuff that would add to knowledge). Guys, all of us know that there's alot of waiting time in the army and the time could easily be used for engaging yourself in a good book. Thus, improving your language, providing entertainment and giving you other benefits that reading might bring along. HOWEVER, to my horror and disgust (as if the fact that porn is distributed didnt do enough), when the lady tried to liase with the army to encourage reading by having a program, she was turned down. Reason being that people would think that NS men have nothing to do in camp and all they do is read. They disallowed her to annouce the campaign.

HELLOOOOO. LIFELONG LEARNING??!! SPEAK GOOD ENGLISH?? SPEAK MANDARIN?? PROMOTING OF ARTS AND CREATIVITY?? AND WHAT OTHER THINGS THE GOVERNMENT IS ASKING US TO LEARN?? AND THEY BLOODY DISTRIBUTE PORN IN ARMY CAMPS. my goodness. is there any wonder if those campaigns didnt work? worst thing is, the reason why nobody has heard of this Read! campaign is because of the little budget they are being given. I could really see the passion and effort being put through the campaign, but with such little resources and minimal backing, i dont see how it could work. Poor NLB.

so seriously people, stop surfing porn and start reading.

p/s: i wrote this entry cos i feel so much injustice for NLB and its poor campaign committee. NS men, do me a favour and insult your superiors when they give you porn to ____ (read? look? what is the word you use for porn?). Kick them in the nuts and say that real men get laid, they don't need porn. HAHAHA.

chanmengye @ 2009-09-16T13:20:00

2009-09-16T05:24:20Z

"Lot's Wife"
Anna Akhmatova

And the just man trailed God's messenger
His huge, light shape devoured the black hill.
But uneasiness shadowed his wife and spoke to her:
"It's not too late, you can look back still

At the red towers of Sodom, the place that bore you,
The square in which you sang, the spinning-shed,
At the empty windows of that upper storey
Where children blessed your happy marriage-bed."

Her eyes that were still turning when a bolt
Of pain shot through them, were instantly blind;
Her body turned into transparent salt,
And her swift legs were rooted to the ground.

Who mourns one woman in a holocaust?
Surely her death has no significance?
Yet in my heart she will never be lost
She who gave up her life to steal one glance

______________________________________________________________

This is more like it la, better than the one liner of a half-baked poem. I like the last line.

chanmengye @ 2009-09-15T01:44:00

2009-09-14T17:47:24Z

"Please"
Richard Brautigan

Do you think of me
as often
as I think
of you?

I miss you, love

erm..some guy called Richard Brautigan wrote a line like that and called himself a poet. WTH?! FAIL.

Freshmen

2009-09-08T14:32:49Z

Yes, it's my first day being an undergrad. (!!!)

Remember when you were young, you always look up to those kor kors and jie jies who are studying in university and they all seem so cool and you picture yourself being just like them when you grow up. Can't believe i'm one of those now. Surely, it's not as glam as it seems 10 years back. It would be awesome if i actually had the full college life package of a proper campus, freshmen orientation, freshmen parties, dorm life, people who are actually eager to make friends and a whole lot of crazy college student fun. What to do...not rich + lousy poly results = having to make do.

Nonetheless, my first official day was good. Got the best lecturer for the worst subject (workplace law), guess i will never remember law subjects like my friends. Because Adrian is awesome. ho say. Of course, Day One was made better with Kinder Bueno and Mentos looking after me. =)

I think i shall be a hardworking student and do my tutorials. Because my friend told me that if i get Distinctions and High Distinctions my eyebrows will grow. For the sake of forever forsaking eyebrow pencils and abandoning my mastery of drawing in brows, I WILL STUDY HARD.

P/S: Somehow I'm not able to enrol myself into the online Murdoch system. WHY?! Must see admin tmr.

20

2009-08-31T14:16:14Z

I should write an entry about turning 20 right?

Here goes...

First of all, i'll like to thank some people for giving me a blast of a birthday this year, you know who you are. =D
On contrary, the festivity didnt quite match up to what i feel. In other words, i'm suffering a bad case of Quarter-Life-Crisis. I'm not sure whether it's the looming adulthood ahead or the uncertainties contributing to my being jaded.

But I stop to give thanks and evaluate my 2 decades. As much as every year has been a rollercoaster ride, there is no denying that I am very much blessed and fortunate to have what i have and to be where i am now. It is easy to lose track of how special our lifes are as life itself take a toll on our beings. However, if there is one thing i've learnt in my 20 years, it's to be thankful.

Although i have no idea what lies ahead in this whirlwind of a life i call mine, i look forward and will hold my head high as i march through this long winding road. Till next year (if i make it), it'll be me officially becoming an adult, and for now i have nothing else to look forward to other than the customary $50 ang pao from grandma and day one of university.

and may i add? I feel too bloody young to be 20, it'll do more justice to say that i'm actually only 17.

chanmengye @ 2009-08-24T14:06:00

2009-08-24T06:13:03Z

neeeeds to shop, because my wardrobe is pathetic. Nothing coolxz to wear. =(
but at the same time i need to save money.

AH. Life and the dilemmas it poses.

And why does everyone around me love shopping?! stop tempting meeeeeeeee. grahhhh.

needs to devise plan to extort more money from parents. hmmmmmm....

list of lists

2009-08-20T14:54:14Z

1. Go picnic at botanic gardens.
2. Go chill, talk talk until sky drop at marina barrage again.
3. Go drive drive, eat eat all night than watch sunrise.
~~4. Go wander around town on foot again. (you'll never know what you'll find. SG is more interesting than you think)~~
5. Go dempsey for overpriced romantic dinner and BNJ's
~~6. and T*****????? maybe maybe. HAHHA.~~
7. Go to cathay picturehouse for a movie in the afternoon and hang around town all day.

Another To-do list before school starts and i have no time:

1. Get my wayfarers fixed at the optical shop
2. go shopping for: rompers, bags, pumps, blouses & sun dresses. (because sch is in town this time, not tampines. but i'll probably go back to shorts and t-shirts within 3 weeks. hahah. i can try)
3. sucessfully un-clutter my table
4. buy a water bottle
5. find a coin-bank and start saving the traditional way. (anyone wanna donate?)
6. a hair-cut!
7. a make-up bag

I hope i will do well for the next 16 months.

death of the hipster.

2009-08-04T15:58:26Z

let's stop being wannabes and really bring some originality to the table ok?

start something new, not wear your grandma's sweater and think it's innovation.

weddings

2009-07-26T19:39:50Z

To Future Husband: Darling, let's do something like that, but only to Billie Jean. NO. You do not have a choice. =D

Havent found any Billie Jean entrances so far, but the above was rad!

To future bridesmaids and bestmen, you do not have a choice either. The bride rules on wedding day. HAHAHA.
My wedding will rock your world! HAHAHAHA.

say what you need to say

2009-07-26T17:13:48Z

this was what i was talking abt

2009-07-24T19:55:14Z

Ryan:	You're not a big fan of needles.
Seth:	Nor of fainting, it turns out. But the bank was a little low and us O Negative guys gotta stick together.
Ryan:	Hm. that's weird because all the sudden I have this strange urge to listen to Death Cab and read comic books.
Seth:	For real?
Ryan:	No.

This made one hugely rubbish wednesday end with a smile.

The OC rocks.

chanmengye @ 2009-07-24T01:18:00

2009-07-23T17:20:56Z

“I found out what the secret to life is - friends. Best friends.”